


Derek Hale's Undercover Summer: How to Attract Your FBI-Partner in These 10 Short Steps (While Also Killing Bad Guys)

by the_problem_with_stardust



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Federal Agents, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Spies & Secret Agents, Undercover Missions, Werewolves are still a thing, graphic descriptions of airplanes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-05
Updated: 2017-12-05
Packaged: 2019-02-04 19:27:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12777870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_problem_with_stardust/pseuds/the_problem_with_stardust
Summary: Written for jennysparkles' awesome prompt: Derek wasn't sure why, but if his time busting the biggest smuggling- and drug-ring in Northern California had the chance to become a book or a movie, it would be named 'Derek Hale's Undercover Summer: How to Attract Your FBI-Partner in These 10 Short Steps (While Also Killing Bad Guys)'. It was ridiculous, how killing people bare-handed turned into a romantic comedy whenever he looked into Stiles' eyes.





	Derek Hale's Undercover Summer: How to Attract Your FBI-Partner in These 10 Short Steps (While Also Killing Bad Guys)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jennysparkles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jennysparkles/gifts).



> Thank you so much to the mods of this exchange! You all are amazing!!

 

**Step 1: Meet his family**

“Come again?”

Surely Derek misheard. He was a team leader for the FBI’s supernatural task force and rarely worked outside of his three subordinates. All three were bitten beta werewolves: Vernon Boyd was also a field agent, Erica Reyes was their weapons technician, and Isaac Lahey took care of anything computer related.

“You are going undercover. With Stilinski,” the Sheriff repeated.

Derek bristled at the idea of splitting up his team. “But Lahey is my hacker.” Even if Stilinski was smart and funny and easy on the eyes. Not that Derek had noticed.

The Sheriff sighed, rubbing a defeated hand over his face. “I know, Hale. But the mission calls for a full-shift alpha werewolf and a human. A hacker and a field agent. You two are my only options.”

“What about Mahealani?”

“His former employer will be present at the event we need to infiltrate. So no visual contact, but he’ll still do mission support with the rest of Argent’s team.” The Sheriff shuffled through some of the files on his desk, clearly waiting for Derek’s next protest.

Instead, Derek dropped back down into his seat. If the Sheriff was talking about combining all three teams in the supernatural division then this was serious business.

“Okay. Human and full-shift alpha. Those are very specific requirements.”

If the Sheriff was surprised by Derek’s easy acceptance, he didn’t show it. “Yes. You and Stilinski will be posing as the Bennets, a pair of up and coming smugglers. Together, you will infiltrate the Calaveras’ summer gala.”

“The Calaveras?” Derek felt his eyes widen. “We’re going after the biggest supernatural drug ring on the west coast?”

“Probably in the US. But yes. We are.” The Sheriff flipped open a folder in front of him, revealing all of the information they had on the Bennets.

Derek took a moment to look over file. Other than the reports on supposed smuggling deals, there were no physical descriptions beyond two males, one an alpha werewolf capable of achieving a full-shift and the other a nondescript human. Derek nodded decisively. Vague he could work with.

“I assume you already spoke to Martin?”

The Sheriff snorted. “Yes. She’s not pleased to lose her hacker, but she’s willing to put up with it so long as we get the Calaveras.”

Lydia Martin was one of the other team leaders. An impressive field agent with an equally impressive team consisting of Scott McCall, field agent and alpha werewolf, Kira Yukimura, weapons technician and kitsune, and Stiles Stilinski the human computer guru.

“Will she be taking point since I’m in the field?”

“No. Argent will be in charge.” The Sheriff paused, looking at Derek. “As long as that’s not going to be a problem.”

Derek took a deep breath. Allison Argent was the third and final team leader in the supernatural division. And she wasn’t her aunt. Derek had worked with her long enough to establish a small amount of trust. Hell, his younger sister was even her weapons technician.

“No, it won’t be an issue.”

“Good.” The Sheriff got to his feet. “And Derek?”

Derek turned from where he was already half out of the Sheriff’s office.

“Please try not to strangle my only son while you’re at it?”

 

**Step 2: Get to know his friends**

Derek let the door thud closed behind him. It wasn’t common knowledge that Stilinski and the Sheriff were related. As a werewolf, he could identify familial scents, but it wasn’t polite to talk about it. The Sheriff’s identity was top secret after all.

“That didn’t take nearly as long as I expected.”

Speak of the devil. Stilinski was leaning against the wall only a few feet away. He flashed a sly grin that definitely didn’t make Derek's stomach swoop.

“You ready to meet the team?”

Derek rolled his eyes. “I already know the team.”

All twelve members of the FBI's supernatural division were recruited around the same time. Most went through agent training together. That being said, Derek hadn’t worked much with the other two teams. Maybe he should start. He’d see Cora more than once a month that way.

Wordlessly, he followed Stilinski to the conference room, letting the other agent fill the silence with statistics from each of the weapons in the division’s arsenal. Stilinski could have been a great weapons technician with all of the random information trapped in his head.

When they entered the conference room, Stilinski was halfway through a comparison between natural wolfsbane and the genetically modified strains that the FBI used.

Martin raised an eyebrow. "Nice of you to join us."

Stilinski shrugged, sprawling out in the seat next to McCall who still wasn't intimidating enough to be a field agent. Derek hovered in the doorway until Kira patted the space next to her. She’d been Derek’s training partner since day one, so he didn’t react when she nudged his shoulder with a knowing smirk.

Before she could start her subtle teasing about Derek’s crush, Argent’s team shuffled in, closely followed by Erica, Isaac, and Boyd. Derek had to admit that Argent was a professional. She somehow managed (with the help of Mahealani) to keep Whitmore in line. Even Cora, who was more paranoid than Derek himself, loved her.

“Is it true they’re splitting us up?” Isaac whispered. He was watching Stilinski with a closed off expression, no doubt worried about getting replaced.

Erica snorted. “Don’t worry, hun. Our mighty alpha just needs to stretch his social skills every once in a while.”

“We could always trade Derek for Kira,” Boyd said, taking the seat on Derek’s other side.

Derek glared at his betas, who settled under the weight of what Isaac called ‘the dad look.’ “Nobody’s getting traded. We’re taking down the Calaveras.”

The room feel silent. Even Stilinski sat up straight, breaking off his hushed conversation with McCall.

Argent cleared her throat. “Alright. Now that everyone is here, we should go over the mission.”

 

**Step 3: Show off your skills**

“I can’t believe they’re making us do all of the work.”

Stilinski tugged his pant leg down over the wolfsbane coated knife sticking out of his boot. Derek ignored him, mentally running over the plan again. It was easier to take an identity instead of creating a new one, so the real Bennets needed to be arrested and questioned.

Argent thought it would be best if the two of them took on the Bennets alone. Something about establishing trust in a partner while also learning how the Bennets behaved. Derek didn’t want to call bullshit this early in the game, but seriously?

The com crackled to life in his ear. “Target at two o’clock.”

“Show time.” Stilinski shoved open the passenger door of the car.

Derek sighed, following at a more sedate pace. They were on a public beach and the Bennets were the only other people around for miles. It might have had something to do with the scent of rain in the air. Either way, it meant no witnesses.

The Bennets were facing the water, beach chairs close together. Derek was starting to suspect the two men weren’t brothers like he’d assumed.

It was almost embarrassing how close the two agents got before Michael Bennet even noticed. An alpha werewolf shouldn’t be caught off guard that easily. Derek shifted onto four paws, uniform tearing away like it was designed to. The other alpha meet tooth with tooth and claw with claw.

Wounds inflicted by an alpha always took longer to heal, so after a particularly brutal toss, Derek snapped Bennet’s spine. The wolf whimpered and Derek rolled to the side, blood matting his dark fur.

Stilinski’s voice echoed over the coms. “Targets neutralized.”

The superficial cuts on Derek’s snout stitched together first. He lay still, listening to the rest of the task force leaving the vans.

“I really don’t think I look like a Jason,” Stilinski mused. He regarded the unconscious human with a thoughtful expression, lip caught between his teeth.

Derek huffed, moving out of the way so Erica and Kira could restrain the other alpha. His ribs were healing much slower than he would like. Changing back to human form would be agony.

A few hours later, Derek was more-or-less back to two legs and dressed in the sweatpants Isaac loaned him. Argent and most of the team had vanished as soon as they arrived at HQ. Interrogating the Bennets probably.

Derek had just contemplated leaving the breakroom when he heard familiar footsteps approaching. Instead, he sat back down to wait for Stilinski and Argent. Kicking another alpha’s ass was hard work.

As soon as the two agents rounded the corner, a t-shirt that smelled like Stilinski landed over his face. Derek sighed. “Anything new?”

“We did get one thing.”

Derek dragged the shirt over his head. “What?”

“They’re definitely not brothers.” Stilinski dropped two chains holding matching rings onto the table.

Argent leaned against the doorway and shrugged. “It’s good information to have. But it doesn’t change the mission.”

“We can handle it. Derek and I are professionals.” Stilinski quirked an eyebrow. “Right honeybunch?”

Derek rolled his eyes, but nodded. “Stilinski’s right. We’re professionals.”

“Seriously dude? We’ve been working together for three years. Call me Stiles.”

 

**Step 4: Be a gentleman**

It wasn’t that Derek disliked planes. They were just cramped. And loud. And smelled awful. But agents were good at pretending, so he pasted on a charming smile and carried Stilinski – no, Stiles’ – bag for him like a doting husband.

Stiles wandered along beside him, fingers flying over his phone screen. It looked like he was just texting or sending an email, but Derek knew better. His partner was planning something without discussing it first. This was why Derek never worked outside his own team.

“Darling, you know I hate it when you bring your work home with you,” he said, voice pleasant.

With a sideways look, Stiles tucked the phone into his back pocket. “Then I guess it’s a good thing this is a working weekend.”

He reached out for his bag, clearly dismissing Derek’s concern. As they approached the gate, Derek slid a hand from Stiles’ shoulder blades down his spine, leaving it at the small of his back. Trying to ignore the flex of muscle beneath his fingers and the rapid uptick in Stiles’ heartrate, he passed their tickets over to the gate agent.

The Bennets were loaded, so Stiles and Derek were seated in the first class cabin. Hopefully far, far away from any screaming infants. Waiting for the doors to close and leave them sealed in with nothing but recycled air was agony. Derek leaned his head back against the seat, ignoring the inflight demonstration in favor of bracing himself for the whine of the turbines.

They were almost at cruising altitude when he noticed something off. Stiles was wired. He bounced his leg restlessly, fingers tapping out an uneasy rhythm along his thighs. Any noise that could be heard over the drone of the engines made his hand stray toward his spelled knife.

“Hey. Relax.” Derek wrapped an arm around his fake-husband’s shoulders. “No one here smells threatening.”

Stiles nodded, some of the tension draining out of his body. He slumped, warm and heavy against Derek’s side. It made sense for Derek to turn his head and bury his nose in Stiles’ soft hair. He smelled much better than the plane after all.

 

**Step 5: Dress to impress**

Stiles let out a pornographic moan. It took all of Derek’s self-control not to turn around and pin him to the mattress.

“This is it, you’re on your own. I live here now.” Most of Stiles’ words were muffled by the sheets.

Derek continued setting up their surveillance equipment. The hotel room was lavish, with soft carpet and a massive bed. And after three hours in a plane it smelled heavenly.

By the time everything was in order, Stiles’ heartbeat was slow and even. Derek shook his head. It never ceased to amaze him how easily Stiles fell asleep. The second he sensed safety, he was out like a light.

While the other agent napped, Derek showered off the scent of strangers and stale air. He debated shaving for half a second, then dragged on his dress pants and a white collared shirt.

Stiles was sitting on the bed, somehow already dressed in his evening attire. Derek scrubbed his towel over his head one final time, then started buttoning his shirt. He could feel Stiles watching, cataloguing his every move.

When the last button was fastened, Derek stood up and rummaged through his suitcase. Someone had picked out matching ties for them to wear to the gala.

“Here.” Derek slung the roll of blue silk at Stiles, who almost fell off the bed.

“Not all of us have werewolf reflexes,” Stiles grumbled. “Or field agent reflexes.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “You passed the same tests I did.” He tied a deft knot thanks to years of family gatherings and weddings and funerals.

“Could you…” Stiles trailed off, tie hanging loose around his neck.

It took Derek a moment to realize. “You don’t know how to tie a tie?” Stiles Stilinski, one of the best hackers in the _world_ , couldn’t tie his own tie. It was mind blowing.

“I wore a clip on to the only school dance I ever went to.”

That was just a shame. “Come here.” Derek pulled him in front of the mirror, hooking his chin over the other agent’s shoulder. “Pay attention to my hands.”

Stiles shivered, but watched intently as Derek looped the fabric around into a double Windsor. When their eyes met in the mirror, Stiles’ pupils were blown wide. Derek pulled the knot snug, then stepped away, already missing the warmth of Stiles against him.

He cleared his throat. “We should probably get going.”

“Right. Yeah.” Stiles’ fingers worried at the tie. “Thank you.”

 

**Step 6: Let him help you out**

Derek would never get used to the feeling of strangers’ eyes on him. They made his wolf itch, clawing at his skin. He took a deep breath and wrapped an arm around Stiles’ waist.

“Are you good?” he asked.

Stiles flashed him a quick grin. “You go mingle. I’ll get us something to drink.”

At that moment, Derek desperately wished he was the hacker. While Stiles got to tap into the Calavera’s security system, Derek had to make nice with the other guests. And knowing how revolting these people were made the whole ordeal ten times worse.

“Be safe,” Derek said, dropping his voice so not even an eavesdropping werewolf could hear.

Stiles trailed a hand down the side of Derek’s face, stubble rasping against his skin. “Go meet some new friends.”

Then he disappeared among the other well-dressed people. Derek sighed.

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t Michael Bennet.”

Derek turned to see a face he recognized from every nation’s most wanted list. Sofia Calavera, the matriarch of the American branch of the Calavera family. She was about Derek’s age and very beautiful.

“It’s alright, wolf. I am much more lenient than my mother.” Sofia leaned into Derek’s space. “Sometimes you have to work with the enemy to achieve your goals.”

Repressing a shudder, Derek tried to remember his manners. “It is a beautiful party.”

“It is, isn’t it?” She crowded him back until he was against the wall. “And you are also very beautiful, for a wolf.”

The memory of Kate Argent saying similar things hovered in his mind. Another hunter, another party. But this time, Derek had a lot fewer family members to lose.

“There you are.” Stiles slid into the space between Derek and the woman. “I brought us something to drink.”

Derek accepted the glass, letting Stiles’ scent overpower her perfume. “Thank you, darling.”

“Well aren’t you two just adorable,” Sofia cooed. “You must be Jason.”

Stiles smiled, eyes cold. “Indeed. I’m going to dance with my husband now.”

“Don’t let me keep you.” She watched them go, a calculating expression on her face.

 

**Step 7: Show your emotional side**

“Aren’t you going to ask?”

Stiles rolled up his tie, setting it back in Derek’s suitcase. “It isn’t my place.”

They were both dressed for bed in boxers and (at least in Stiles’ case) a t-shirt. The rest of the gala had passed uneventfully. If they hadn’t been in a den of hunters specializing in the illegal transport and sale of wolfsbane-laced drugs, Derek might have enjoyed himself.

“Maybe I want to tell you.” Derek stared at the ceiling, sprawled out in the bed.

It dipped as Stiles claimed the other side. “Only if you want too.”

Derek took a deep breath. He hadn’t told anyone since Laura. But if he wanted any kind of future with Stiles, he knew he had to tell him. For his own sake.

“When I was younger, a hunter seduced and used me to gather information about my family. Then she burned them alive.” There. Short and to the point. “I have another sister who still lives in the old Hale territory. And you already know Cora.” Derek breathed through his mouth and kept his eyes fixed on the ceiling. He didn’t want to see or smell Stiles’ reaction.

Finally, Derek turned his head. Instead of finding shock and horror, Stiles just looked sad. “I’m sorry that you had to go through that.”

“You already knew,” Derek said, voice flat. His biggest secret and Stiles had already known.

Stiles sighed. “My dad’s the Sheriff. I’m a hacker. An incredibly nosy hacker.”

After a moment, Derek snorted. “I don’t know why I expected anything else from you.”

“Shut up. You love me,” Stiles flopped onto his side, eyes dark in the dim room.

The words were right at the tip of Derek’s tongue when a loud knock shattered the moment.

 

**Step 8: Protect the people he cares about**

At least they’d had the presence of mind to get dressed before the Calaveras’ guards dragged them out of their room and into an office. Sofia was there, pacing behind the desk. It made sense that she would own this hotel.

Stiles stifled a yawn. “Miss Calavera. It’s the middle of the night. My husband and I had a long flight-”

“Please stop.” Sofia moved around the table, high heels clicking on the marble. She tugged Stiles’ head to the side, checking for an earpiece.

Derek growled low in his chest. “What do you want?”

“Information,” she said, stepping back from Stiles. “Who are you? Who do you work for? Why are you here? Because you are certainly not the Bennets.”

There went their cover. But Stiles still had it in him to sneer at her. “Like we’d give you anything.”

“I think you will.” She chuckled. “Actually, I know you will.”

Then another guard hauled in a very familiar face. The Sheriff.

Stiles went still. Derek could hear his heart racing, panic setting in. “If you know who he is, then you don’t need any more information.”

“You’re right. I just wanted to torture you all together.” She gestured to her guards, who cuffed all three of them to the desk. “Now, I don’t know how many more rats you’ve got in here. So, I’ll just take care of everyone in the hotel.”

“Everyone? But these are your colleagues,” Stiles said.

Sofia turned away, scoffing. “Colleagues? Colleagues? These people are my competition.”

Then Derek saw it. A spiderman flash-drive plugged into Sofia Calavera’s private computer. Stiles Stilinski was a genius. Now they just had to figure out how to get away.

“Enjoy the rest of your stay, boys,” she called as she closed the door behind her.

The Sheriff immediately unshackled his hands. “It’s gas. We’ve got to go. Now.”

Stiles and Derek followed suit just as a purple vapor began pouring from the vents.

“Shit, it’s wolfsbane,” Stiles grabbed Derek’s hand and yanked him after his dad. “Let’s go, let’s go.”

The burning started almost immediately. Derek coughed, head spinning. Stiles was still running, but the Sheriff wasn’t looking good. Without a second thought, Derek dragged the Sheriff’s arm over his head.

“Come on, we’re almost there.” The words came out a garbled mess, but it didn’t matter. A few seconds later, they were crashing through an emergency exit and breathing in fresh, clean air.

 

**Step 9: Lay everything out there**

“I’m going back in.”

“Derek, no.” Stiles’ voice was barely a rasp.

But Derek’s mind was already made up. “We still need the drive. All of this will be useless without that information.”

“We’ll come up with something else.” Stiles slowly got to his feet, leaving his dad sitting on the pavement.

Derek thought of the look on Sofia Calavera’s face and shook his head. “Not fast enough.”

Taking a deep breath, he sorted out his thoughts. If these were going to be his last words, he should at least make them count. His teammates and sisters would all receive letters in the event of his death, but he still had one last secret.

“Stiles.” He laced both of their hands together. “I knew from the moment I met you that you were going to change my life.”

“Don’t do this,” Stiles whispered.

“Thank you. For everything.” Derek tried not to think of prank wars and long training sessions and hours spent in deep conversation. “I love you.”

And with that, Derek turned and sprinted back the way they’d come, followed by Stiles’ hoarse shouts.

“Derek!”

His dad held him back. “Let him go, son. Let him go.”

The drive was right where Stiles had left it, the download completed. Derek gripped it in shaking fingers. His lungs burned with every breath and his vision was starting to go foggy. He ran toward the entrance, bursting out through the doors and collapsing onto the sidewalk.

 

**Step 10: Hope for the best**

Derek woke up to the smell of antiseptic. It was so strong, it almost overpowered the other scent in the room. The scent of gunpowder and electricity. Stiles.

Peeling his eyelids open, Derek’s gaze landed on a familiar figure sprawled in the chair next to the bed. Stiles’ head was tipped back at an angle that made Derek’s neck ache in sympathy. As he watched, Stiles tried to roll over, jerking awake as he slid out of his seat.

He was on his feet in an instant, fully alert like only a trained agent could be. Once he realized where he was, his hands dropped to his sides and he sighed. Even in the dim light, Derek could see the dark shadows pooling under his eyes.

“Hey,” he managed, voice cracking from disuse.

Stiles jumped again, heartrate rabbit fast. “Derek?”

“Yeah.” The dryness in his throat sent him into a coughing fit that left him feeling dizzy and wrung out.

Gentle hands eased him into a sitting position, rearranging pillows and raising the bed behind him. A straw appeared in his line of sight and Derek drank eagerly, clearing away some of the cottony sensation on his tongue.

Then the water was gone and he was left staring at the side of Stiles’ face. His hands twitched, like it pained him to stay still, but he didn’t meet Derek’s eyes. He cleared his throat.

“I’m going to get Dr. Deaton to check on you and then I’m going to yell at you.”

Derek closed his eyes, listening to the retreating footsteps echoing down the hall and trying to ignore the sinking feeling in his chest.

A few moments later, Deaton knocked on the doorframe. He looked as relieved as Deaton ever did. “You gave us quite a scare there, Agent Hale.”

Derek answered some basic questions, confirming that his mental faculties were still in place then sat still as Melissa checked his vitals. Deaton scribbled everything down on his clipboard.

“Well Agent, it looks like you are healing just fine now that the toxin is out of your system. We’ll keep you under observation for another day or so, then you should be ready to go home.”

Thinking about his empty apartment was enough to make Derek cringe. “When do I get cleared for duty?”

Melissa sighed. “Derek. You went through a traumatic event and needed medical attention. It’ll take a couple of weeks at the least.”

That was more than ideal. He’d have to get a hobby or something. Or maybe spend more time bothering Cora.

When Deaton opened the door to leave, Stiles was already there. He pushed off of the wall across the hallway and held the door for the doctor and nurse.

Melissa caught his shoulder. “Go easy on him.”

Stiles brushed passed her with a nod. Derek watched him warily, waiting for the human to put his thoughts in order. He didn’t have to wait long.

“You asshole! You dropped all of those feelings on me and didn’t even give me a chance to respond?” Stiles paced, agitation coming off of him in waves. “You could have fucking died!”

The slight shake in his voice and scent of desperation tinged in relief gave Derek pause. It didn’t sound like a rejection.

“I can’t believe you.” Stiles finally turned to meet his eyes, the look on his face making Derek’s heart beat faster. “You self-sacrificing bastard.”

“Are you done calling me names?” Derek didn’t break eye contact.

Stiles appeared to think about it, then said, “Yeah, I think that’s everything. Also I love you, but that didn’t quite fit with the yelling.”

That was the last straw. “Come here,” Derek all but growled. His eyes were probably glowing alpha red.

“What?” Stiles looked alarmed. “You said it first, no take backs.”

Derek huffed, wolf back under control. “I can’t kiss you if you’re over there.”

“Oh,” Stiles breathed, eyes widening. He scrambled around the bed, almost tripping over his own feet in his haste.

Despite his clumsiness, Stiles kissed him almost too gently. He pulled back with a stern look.  “No more reckless decision making, you hear?”

“Our line of work is entirely made up of reckless decisions,” Derek pointed out.

“Well, at least promise you’ll try to stay alive. For me?” Stiles traced his fingers over Derek’s brow, smoothing his short hair away from his face.

“I’ll do my best.” Derek caught his other hand and laced their fingers together. “But you have to promise the same thing.”

“I will.” His heartbeat stayed steady.

Derek tugged their joined hands and pressed a kiss to the back of Stiles’ hand, feeling the scars and calluses against his skin. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> Dear jennysparkles,  
> I had so much fun with this prompt.  
> Hope I was able to do it justice!
> 
> EDIT: rebloggable link (and edit) is [HERE!](https://theproblemwithstardust.tumblr.com/post/168487136599/derek-hales-undercover-summer-how-to-attract)


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